Reflections of my ideal love this is what i want for me one day

So there was some serious relationship Drama in this house Last night.All I can say is this is why I'm not in one because this is what i want.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIN0wnElh9Q If you follow that link you will see what I am looking for.I really believe in this type of love i believe that two people can be truly satisfied and content and complete with just on other person Yeah it takes work especially in a Pos neg pos pos situation as those are my only two options.In any world gay or straight Love does not come easy it is not all sunshine and roses it take work before you get the roses you must till the soil and get dirty your self love is remarkable you know.It is immeasurable it is unbounding it is wonderful and yes i want to be apart of that happy world one day but right now I am working on me taking care of what i need to internally and learning how to be a better person a better man.I want to be all that can be so that when that day comes when i find that one special person who takes me as i am and loves me and trusts in me well I want to be a better man for him so that i don't repeat the mistakes of my past relationships and I don't want to see my failures in life unfold all over again.I do not know how to tell a friend you know I just cant say what you do is right but i am not you and you gotta do what it takes to make it work between you two. I love my Friends and don't judge them I want them to find the happiness that i seek for myself because everyone deserves that in life you know what i am saying.I know many people think that i am out of my mind for taking care of me but i love who i am who i have become the man I am today.I like to think that everything that has happend in my life has led me here every person i know has helped me to grow in some way.I don't want ot distance myself from my friends i want to show them how good life is for everyone and that they should take in each and everyone of they're blessings.and yeah I am human I have done my share of very stupid things like revenge sex and other things.I have done things that have hurt myself more than anyone else ever could.I know that I have been down a road that others should not dare to follow i have walked the streets and been homeless and sold myself for a meal and a hot bed to sleep in i have done all these things I have made my mistakes in my life and i have grown from these things these are things that i have never told many people not even my parents.But i am a survivor i am a better man today because of the suffering i have incurred in my life.I have suffered to tell my story to others so they don't make the same mistakes i have.I am proud of who i am I may not be proud of some of the things i have done in my life but i own them i did them yeah but I am not my mistakes as i am not my disease i am simply Me.I know that some of the things i say come across as strong especially when i feel i am right.But moral or not we are all meant to be with someone but not before we are ready and not before we have fully explored ourselves we must know who we are what we are and how we are before we can start making serious decisions in life like will i spend the rest of my life with this person or is he/she just a passing fling.We must know our hearts and our selves we must be comfortable with who we have evolved into before we can say yeah I'm ready for this.Life can pitch us some curve balls so keep you eye on the prize and remember love is about quality not quantity.I have had my share of beautiful men and i have had any man I could want but none of them were worth me.because beauty and sex and lust are not what i am interested in I only want one thing LOVE real LOVE the kind that spans the ages and people write stories about for years and generations to come.Like I said Quality not quantity.The man i marry must be one hell of a guy and people will say he has class he has style he is humble and he is kind he must be born this way.The Man I marry will shine i will look at him when we are lying out looking at the stars and i will know he is the brightest shining star in the whole of creation and i will look at the beauty all around i will see him and know there is nothing more beautiful than him.his heart will be so big he would love me and my crazy ass family in all its glory our love will be looked at by my family and they will say yeah i want love like that.Not 18 year old love not grandma and grandpa love not mom and dad love but love that the fires burn in our hearts through out eternity the love that will surpass life and death that will keep us on in the after life and if we are born again in another life the love we shared in this life will move forward and draw us to one another in the next life.I believe that love truly exist like this i saw how my grandparent loved and my parents and even my brother and his wife my two aunts how they loved each other I want a drama free complication free love i know there will be work to do and I've got allot to do before i am ready to achieve this goal but that day will come i know it.and when it comes I will be ready I will learn from the mistakes of others i will bide my time work on me and be a great man when the day comes that i find the man that will make a home in my heart and a home for me in his.